Love this family of mine.
“Love your family.
Spend time, be kind & serve one another.
Make no room for regrets.
Tomorrow is not promised & today is short.”
The 2015 Graduate
She did it!
And under the most difficult circumstances possible.
Even made the Deans list during the most difficult semester possible.
We are so proud of this Girl!
Death may have coldly and cruelly stolen her father,
but it didn't lay claim to her
Courage
Determination
Faith
&
Perseverance!
She kept her head bowed, she resides in prayer and is weathering the storm!
I know your dad was and is with you every step of the way Des!
And today he boldly cheers along with the rest of us!
Congratulations!
We Love YOU!
Great Horned Owl
This morning, preparing to head to work, Man with a drill opened the door of our cabin and beheld a most shocking sight. There she was, perched on the porch. beautiful and most majestic! He ran back and woke me. It was early in the morning. I grabbed my camera adjusted the settings and began to shoot. The sound of my shutter caused her head to come around. She looked at me with that piercing eye. I shot as fast as I could before she flew away.
It is said that owls are symbolic. Owls can see clearly in the night. They are a symbol of bringing clarity to the darkness. They are always a symbol associated with clear perception and wisdom. It is said that the Owl is sacred to the greek goddess of learning. In ancient Egyptian, Celtic, and Hindu cultures the symbolic meaning of the Owl revolved around guardianship of the underworlds, and protection of the dead. In this light the Owl was ruler of the night and seer of souls. The Owl was honored as the keeper of spirits who had passed from one plane to another. The Ainu in Japan trust the Owl because it gives notice of evil approaching. In the Navajo belief system, the Owl was Chief of the night and was a symbol of protection.
My mother loved owls. On the night she died, I heard not one owl, but two, just outside my window. I must admit, it brought me great comfort as my tears fell all through the night. The sound of their hooting brought me some peace, a hopeful reminder that both of my parents were finally together again.
Happy Moosey Anniversary!
Man with a drill and I were celebrating thirty-seven years of marriage. The day started out with sickness. It's cold and flu season! Given the state of how we both felt, we decided to bag any attempt to celebrate. Dinner was out of the question since I would not be able to hold it down. The overwhelming desire to stay in bed led us to the next decision--- if we were going to be sick in bed all day, we might as well be sick in the most comfortable place on earth. We loaded all of our over the counter drugs in the car and headed for the cabin.
Logan canyon is 34 miles long. When you cross over the cattle guard you are at mile 17. That's the half way point in Logan Canyon. I suppose I was taking note of the mileage because I couldn't wait to get there. That's when we spotted her, just after the cattle guard.
Little did I know I was going to spend the next hour chasing a moose. I'm an animal lover. I should have known my heart would immediately be sucked in. Upon seeing her we quickly deducted she was only a calf. There ya go ---who can resist a baby moose? Not me!
I drifted to the edge of the road in my Envoy as I scrambled to find my camera. With my lens now pointed out the window at her, my next thought was... "Where in the heck is your mother?" Man with a drill had the sense to take the wheel. So there we were, me with my foot on the gas and my camera hanging out the window and Man with a drill seated comfortably in the passenger seat trying to steer us straight. Not your most conventional driving standards, but we were making it work.
We've had five feet of snow in the canyon the last few days. I know because I've driven up and down in it a bajillion times! It soon became apparent that this little moose had made up her mind to avoid the deep snow. She was not going to attempt to go anywhere past the pavement. I'm sure somewhere in her head she had concluded cars were easier maneuver than hard frozen snow. She did not like me driving to the side of her clicking my camera. One ear came back in disgust. Her annoyance with me was obvious.
The next thing that happened broke my heart. As the traffic began to build so did her fear. The more afraid she got the more she ran. Now I had a Semi behind me and a long line of cars. Semi truck drivers are vigilant people. He must have been a man with a big heart because he immediately took up the road with me. Our flashers came on simultaneously. We were both now in "MOOSE MODE." I followed the moose, he drove down the center behind me refusing to let cars pass.
I quickly came up with a plan. Tony's grove has a partially plowed road, I told Man with a drill. "We've got to drive her up that road or she'll die running down this one!" Moose never do what you want them to. We followed her all the way to Tony's and tried to steer her into turning. She was having none of it. Now we were headed to Red Banks. I was lamenting something fierce to Man with a drill about how Red Banks is not plowed and there is no where for her to go. I just kept talking, "She is going to get hit if we don't get her off this road. We both concurred, we had to turn this moose around.
Just then we saw another semi coming toward us. She did not want to pass that big old truck. I slowed and pulled a little closer to her and she slowed and turned herself around wanting to avoid us all. The semi behind me now decided to give up the ghost and he and the long line of cars all drove slowly past.
I married a good man. I ask him if we too should leave her. "She's going to die on this road if we don't help her ya know." I gave him that pleading look. "OK," he said, "Turn around!"
I didn't hesitate. I pulled a fast U-ee, and pulled up next to the semi that was now driving down the canyon. The next thing I knew another big white ford had joined the scene. Our windows came down. We were screaming over the engines back and forth. I told them about the road up Tony's and I told them we had to get her to turn up that road.
I didn't hesitate. I pulled a fast U-ee, and pulled up next to the semi that was now driving down the canyon. The next thing I knew another big white ford had joined the scene. Our windows came down. We were screaming over the engines back and forth. I told them about the road up Tony's and I told them we had to get her to turn up that road.
The next thing ya know we looked like a convoy. We pulled all three vehicles abreast the highway. Me in the lane of the oncoming traffic. We slowed our speed so the poor moose could walk. Luckily the men in the white Ford were tried and true 'Red Necks'. The beards, the plaid flannel shirts and the size of the jack up on the truck gave it all away. I was so happy! I love red necks. Ya gotta be part red neck to chase a moose!
The oncoming traffic was a bit stumped. Thankfully a moose, a semi, a Ford and a GMC Envoy in the middle of the road is a good deterrent to stop. Seeing we were going to need some help at the other end, the men in the Ford decided to slowly pass the moose and head for Tony's to form a barricade. I told them she's not going to want to turn. I told them how we had tried this scenario already and it didn't work, she got around us. I gave those Ford men a stern mother's lecture. "I don't care what you do down there but don't let her get past ya!"
As the Ford left his spot in the line up, a young kid in a white Chevy pulled up to take his place. He was obviously a city boy. (Don't you like how I formulate conclusions!) The first dead give away was the time frame it took us to get him to roll his window down. He thought we were crazy and wanted to break formation and pass the moose. Man with a drill filled him in on his new found position in the line up. He also instructed him of his new job. "This moose is going to die if we don't get her off this road." The instructions were not received willingly. His face was aghast! "A Moose can attack your car," he clambered. You could clearly see he had never herded any animal and was filled with mortal fear. I had to laugh listening to Man with a drill explain that the moose was only a calf and had been running back and forth for seven miles on pavement and was in no condition to attack anything. After convincing him that is was ok to break all 'Moose Ethics' and that safety was really not an issue, he complied.
Man with a drill climbed back in the car and we followed her as far as my four wheel drive would let us. I was feeling all motherly and I didn't want to leave her. We decided to drive her in as deep as we could and make sure she was well off the road before the demise of dark hit. I want to kick myself for not taking one last picture of her standing there exhausted safe and sound. With the lack of light though and the sheer joy of seeing her off that busy road, I didn't even think about my camera. Perhaps I couldn't bring myself to torture her one inch further. I don't know why I didn't think of it, I just didn't ---but I can still see her in my heart... standing there, her head hanging low, breathing heavy, steam pouring from her small frame, her weakened stance full of relief, grateful to be far from the commotion in the still of the forest. I might not have taken one last shot with my camera, but trust me, she will be forever framed, alive and well inside my head.
Man with a drill and I turned ourselves back onto the highway. We talked about the whole event. I am an optimist. So I'd like to think her mother found her in the dark. I named her "Toni." I had to, we have a personal relationship now. I am a bit annoyed that I am now forever changed. I want to cuss her. Every time I drive that canyon now I'll be looking for her. I'll forever wonder with every moose I see, "Is that you Toni?" She's gotten under my skin. She has taken up permanent residency in my head and in my heart. Dang her hide! Well, a girl can dream. I hope she finds Bruce in the spring. And like Man with a drill and I, maybe they'll join hooves and have eight little Mooselets and celebrate 37 wonderful years, with more ahead of them. I guess this is where I say Happy Moosey Anniversary to me! What a day to write about!
Speed Shooting!
We were on our way home from Portland, Oregon.
Driving on the freeway doin' 75MPH
I had to have a picture. Not bad for a burst of speed shooting.
"Trees are the earth's endless effort to speak to the listening heaven." ~Tagore
"A Perfectly Good Day To Be Alive"
"Home On The Plains"
"A Perfectly Good Day To Be Alive"
"Sometimes the very best way to feel centered in life is to go walking.
It never fails, if I am frayed at the ends, tired,
and feeling the weight of the world pressing in on me, I simply need to walk and with a camera." ~Faye Crowther
“All truly great thoughts are conceived while walking.” ~Friedrich Nietzsche
"Walking . . . is how the body measures itself against the earth." ~Rebecca Solnit
"Heaven And Earth"
"Heaven & Earth"
It's a first place winner, and Royce Bair ask me to send it to him to be featured on his blog. It feels good to create a beautiful work of art! I am also happy to state I have officially sold my first two prints of it. If you are interested in buying a copy, check out this link. http://fayecrowtherphotography.smugmug.com/ You can find "Art" at the end. click on that and you can purchase it in print. Yup, just sign me HAPPY!
The Sinking Sun
Antelope Island as the sun dipped below the horizon.
“I don't know how long we stay that way, but we watch the sun go down together. The giant, burnt-orange sphere sinks towards the horizon, coloring the rock layers until it's gone and the canyon is covered in shadow.”
“I don't know how long we stay that way, but we watch the sun go down together. The giant, burnt-orange sphere sinks towards the horizon, coloring the rock layers until it's gone and the canyon is covered in shadow.”
My First Great Horned Owl! aWEsome!
I have a few items jotted down on my bucket list. At the top, "Shoot an Owl!" (with my camera of course.) My mom loved owls! She was a farmers wife and Barn owls were always plentiful. On the day she died, that night when I climbed into bed, a complete sobbing wreck, it was the sound of an owl out side my window that comforted me through the night. Yup, I'm now obsessed with owls!
The other day I went for my run and out of the blue, decided to take a new path. Instead of taking the same old route, I turned and headed down through the fields. I decided I'd try and see if I could find my way to the rail trail just north of my house. After crossing over one field after another and trundling through a ditch or two, stopping to pick out a few accumulated burrs that had clung to my socks, I finally found my way to a place I hadn't been in years.
It felt good to be on this trail again. As I ran, I had Big Ben looming in the distance in front of me and the sight was beautiful. I probably had put in about four miles, when I decided to turn around and head home. On the way back however, something led me in a different direction. I decided to go all the way out, passing the first field I had originally come in from. I decided I would continue West and hit the main road and then travel South until I reached two additional fields I hadn't crossed over. That way I would get to cover more ground. Looking back now I think my mother was having a great influence on me from a different sphere.
I can't tell you how many Russian Olive Trees I passed that morning. The fact that I saw him at all is a sheer miracle, but as I was running I noticed a section of grass that had been flattened down. Something stopped me dead in my tracks and I was looking at that grass for no apparent reason at all, when suddenly I looked up and there he was sitting ever so still, frozen on a branch 15 feet in front of me. I nearly passed out and died!
I just stood there in a trance! It's not every day you run into an owl, especially a Great Horned! I didn't dare move. After five long minutes, I began to wonder if he were fake. Would someone stick a fake plastic owl in a tree? That would be more like my luck! Then I wondered if his back was to me. It was dark in the tree and all I could see was his silhouette. He looked so big. I decided I had to have some sort of picture, I slowly slipped my iPhone out of my pocket and pressed the button. That was hopeless. He was in the worst spot ever for lighting!
It was at that moment, I made an executive decision, and decided I had to run home for my SLR. I've never in my life made such good time getting home on foot. I flew in the door, grabbed my gear, jumped in the car, and drove like a crazy woman back to the rail trail! I mean seriously, what were the chances he would still be there? I hurried every chance I could. When I climbed out of the car, I set up my tripod, attached my camera and got all ready. I didn't want to scare him setting up all my gear right in front of him.
As I quietly crept up to the spot I had seen him, I was amazed he was still sitting there. I wondered if he was in a coma! I took the lens cap off my 28-300 zoom and extended it all the way out and looked in the glass. OH BABY!
Can I just tell you what a freaking thrill it was when our eyes met, it was better than any feeling I've ever had! Oh those eyes... WOW! I could have stared at him all day. I think I totally exhausted a 32 gig camera card. And then to realize he'd been sitting there looking at me the entire time. I can only imagine his thoughts! And I could have stood there all day. I tried to call Jerel Olsen. He was not home. (sad sigh). Jerel is a master photographer. I knew absolutely nothing about what I was doing, me and my very first Great Horned Owl and I had a million questions. I was doing everything I could to get him sharp and with some light. I knew I needed sharp eyes! I just tried everything I've ever learned and then I prayed and chimped! It was rough! The sun was at his back. I fought with my settings. My choices were sky and trees blown out or the owl to dark to see. I have no filters and I haven't had a plethora of owls to practice on. Great Horned Owls just don't fly in and perch in front of me every day.
So here he is people, my best shot. It might not be that stupendous, but I'll take it. Just the encounter alone was worth a million bucks!
Shot at ISO 320 1/160 sec @ F5.6 (The background is a little blown out, but hey... I wasn't shooting in the most favorable conditions. I decided to take the owl over the background!
Looking For Light
Today I had the most amazing experience. I must choose my words carefully if meaning is to be conveyed in the deepest sense.
She is my granddaughter. She is getting baptized. I said to her as we held hands and walked from the car to the temple, "Do you know something Ali?"
"No Grandma, what?" She replied. I went on to tell her how I became a photographer. "When your Aunt Desi got on the bus to go to Kindergarten, almost fifteen years ago. . . I said to myself as the bus drove away, ""There goes my job."" Then I went on to explain how I dried all my tears and went out that very day and bought the best film camera Nikon made. "Do you know why I bought a camera, Ali" I asked intently. She looked up at me. "Why did you buy a camera grandma?" Her eyes were focused on me now as we walked, making our way closer to the temple. Just one reason Als, "So I could take your picture when you came to earth! I knew you'd be coming and I couldn't wait to meet you and take your picture!" A big grin broke out consuming her face! Then I went on to tell her how taking her picture is better than sliced bread and bubble gum! She knows I love bubble gum, and she herself loves sliced bread! I could see every missing tooth now. It was evident in her broad smile she clearly understood.
As we walked, I fumbled with my words. I was trying to pick a vocabulary an 8 year old would understand. I wanted to choose just the right noun, adjective, and verb that came from my soul, thoughts that formed simple words that would penetrate her heart and leave her with the secure knowledge that I love her more than life itself!
I'm a perfectionist. As we got to the front of the temple, I started taking her picture. Immediately I noticed the light was hard and flat. Light is everything to a photograph. Heck, light is everything to everything! Besides, I am fascinated with light. My soul thrives off it. My photography depends on it. When I go for long periods of time without light I get down right depressed. Yet when it's present, my soul comes alive with a joy I can scarcely contain. Light always lifts me. Darkness is not the opposite of light. Darkness is the absence of light, for where there is light, there can be no darkness. Darkness cannot cast out light! Light can always overcome darkness. Now here I was with my beautiful granddaughter and I thought the light was terrible. It was to far away in the sky and it was making me frustrated. With every snap of my camera I was looking for it and I was struggling to find it. A photographer loves the golden hours, the sun coming up with it's rays shooting horizontally, the sun going down; that precious hour just before it sets. I had neither.
We wandered all over the temple grounds she and I. Me snapping away looking for the light. After taking a billion pictures a thought hit me. I said to Ali, "Let's go inside the temple." I remembered the Atrium downstairs. I knew the light would be perfect there. She was excited. She had never seen the Atrium. We quickly went inside and made our way down the marble staircase.
As soon as she saw the beautiful round garden contained inside the glass, she walked up to see all the colorful flowers and the beautiful autumn tree contained in its center. The Atrium is wide open to the sky and as she got closer to the glass an amazing thing happened. Alison's reflection caught by the light appeared so strong it looked like there were two of her. Alison stood on the outside of the glass and amazingly her mirror image stood on the inside looking back. It was beautiful and symbolic.
I couldn't get my camera pointed at her fast enough. I saw that tender soul like image reflected and immediately began to capture it. Suddenly Ali got the sweetest expression on her face as she gently lifted her hand. I was filled with emotion. "Alison," I said. "It's like your spirit."
Tell me there's not a lesson in that! I talked to Ali about her spirit. I told her about its pure and infinite worth. We talked about the light it needs to grow and become strong and how every choice she will make will affect how intensely she feels that life giving light. We talked about her baptism, about being washed clean. We talked about the importance of her choice to follow our Savior Jesus Christ and how that choice alone brings tremendous light! Then I gave a grandmother's wisdom. "Take care of that little girl in the glass Ali! Promise me you'll make good choices for her. Tend to her, watch over her and protect her. She will be with you your whole life through. Give her the light of Christ daily in every single thing you do, so her image in you will always be bright and strong!
Moments like this don't come any finer. What a blessing it is to be a grandmother. It was a beautiful day and in the end I found that beautiful light I was looking for! Light is like a lot of other things in life. It's always right where you never think to look! Silly me! I'm so glad I found it!
Life Is A Matter Of Perception!
In this life, PERCEPTION IS EVERYTHING! How we choose to look upon things greatly frames our inner most peace, our ability to be happy and to a great extent, our ability to feel love! If you perceive the negative, and act in the negative because of what you 'think' you perceive, then most likely, the outcome you will feel and receive will be a negative one.
To a great extent we create our world in the formation of our perceptions! How we perceive the world shapes our entire life! I can't count the many times I've looked upon something, sure of what I saw or felt, and have been dead WRONG in my perceptions! As I age I am trying to open up my mind to new ways of perceiving everything I encounter. It is NO easy task. The other night I had a great visual lesson taught to me by an open minded soul. It impacted me so much I had to take a picture of it.
Well there you have it! The lesson in a glance. Love or die! You get to choose! It's all in how you look at it.
The other day I had a funny experience. I am a Mormon! I belong to the Church Of Jesus Christ Of Latter Day Saints. Sometimes. . . I am afraid to tell people that I am, yes, in deed, a Mormon. Not because I am ashamed of my religion, but because I'm afraid I'll be judged on the merits of how some people sum up a Utah Mormon. If you live in Utah, then surely somewhere you know a self sanctified, pin headed, holier than thou, Mormon! Then again, that's just my perception! Ha ha ha ha By the way, I spend a lot of time trying NOT to be one of those! They drive me crazy and they give Mormons a bad name! And sad to say, I think there are a lot of them around. Once again though, I'm trying not to perceive what isn't really there.
Back to my story. I tried to give an individual a helping hand and to make a long story short, the individual didn't want to accept it. I perceived that it was because if he accepted my help, he'd have to say something nice about a Mormon! Accepting my help would shatter his perceptions. (Oh, I'm going straight to hell. I think I'll like it there!) There are times we cling to what we want to perceive because it upholds us in our victimhood! If we choose to stand where we can see the LOVE side of things, it strips us of our picked on position, a position in fact, we often like.
Now I look upon my photo here. And I decided to give my friend the benefit of the doubt. Maybe he just didn't really need my help. I'm standing on the side where I can see LOVE in the world! I am not going to perceive what I am not sure really exists in him. In short I'm going to refer to this photograph often. I want to constantly remind my self to look upon life in LOVE! Because to stand in an obsolete corner and view the alternative is in fact to DIE. I had to stand in a lonely little obsolete corner to see and take a picture of the word DIE! So prophetic! I had to come out into the center of the room where life was taking place to see and record the word LOVE! So symbolic! I am certain that every time we fail to love and to be generous in loving, we corner ourselves and we die a little bit on the inside. You are not going to find a lot of love standing in a corner!
Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "People only see what they are prepared to see." These photographs taken from two different positions, opened my eyes!
Dan Millman said, "Pain is a relatively objective, physical phenomenon; suffering is our psychological resistance to what happens. Events may create physical pain, but they do not in themselves create suffering. Resistance creates suffering. Stress happens when your mind resists what is. . . The only problem in your life is your mind's resistance to life as it unfolds." Such a powerful statement!
In the realm of photography. My lens in which I look through only allows me to see things a certain way. Each lens I put on my camera is different. And yet even with my wide angle, on or any other lens, I am amazed at how I'll snap a shot and miss the very subject I thought I was capturing. There is so much to see when you are looking through glass! Even in looking through the best lens for the situation I constantly miss things. I love Steven R. Covey's quote! "We must look at the lens through which we see the world, as well as the world we see. After all, the lens itself shapes how we interpret the world." Such a great comparison!
Today, I'd like to go back to the night I took these two photographs that sort of symbolize LIFE. I want to give the man who came to me and pointed out the two perceptions a big hug! I want to really thank him for literally and quite symbolically, showing me where to stand!
Where I stand in this life. . . affects with power, what I perceive and see! A powerful thought I must remember. . . with or without a camera!
Double Trouble!
All my life I've traveled Logan Canyon.
Not once have I ever seen TWINS!
Not in any species!
A few weeks ago, Man with a drill and I came around the corner
in the dead of night and nearly hit this mama and her babies.
I never thought I'd see her again.
The other day though, fate smiled on me! I was driving home, and thankfully I was driving camera ready. And low and behold, just as I passed Beaver Mt. there they were. They had crossed over to get a drink in the stream. Well, I whipped my jeep around as fast as I could and caught them just before they disappeared in the bushes. Simply delightful!
Light & Love
Life never ceases to amaze me. And I love capturing those beautiful, simple, unfettered moments that speak to the soul. I love this picture. It moves me. It reminds me that above all else, Love is really the only thing that matters in this life. Love is always an expression that lifts, it is a choice we can always make, It is a gift to the one who receives it, and yet it gives in and of itself to the one who chooses to give. And so I hope I am always found in its willingness and in doing so become a constant benefactor of its tremendous blessing!
Funnest Night Ever!
Life is so short, and I am always filled with a deep sense of urgency. I want to make every second count just a little bit more. I don't want to die and find out I never really lived.
Today I'm so happy. Today I lived, I lived fully and with my whole heart and every minute counted! Today was a memory, the kind that travel on into the ages and never die, the kind that leave you feeling full and rich and satisfied beyond belief.
She is the last of the Crows. She's my baby. I know, I know... I could go on and on about that for hours. To make my point in one sentence. She is the last one left to mother! If you know me then you know I hate empty nesting. I love mothering with all my heart. It has been my chosen career! All of my peeps are gone now except Desi. She's partly gone, with her apartment in Logan, but I cling to the days when for a moment she is still mine; like today . . . today, she was MY kid and we were doing what we've done since the day she was born, we were having fun!
My sweet little memory all started when Des asked me if I wanted to go to the side walk sale in Logan. "Do you want to go mom?" "Yup!" When and where," that was my only response.
I didn't see it coming. I never do. I should have known. I thought we were headed for a side walk sale, you know, swim suits, clothes, shoes, jewelry, all that stuff girls love. I didn't know there was a book store on main street! Then I saw the sign, "Going Out Of Business, 30 percent off." Oh dear, I lamented! I barely had that thought pass through space in my head when my daughter disappeared through the front door of the old stately white building. She was gone, transported, like she'd found instantaneous time travel. Books of Yesterday would never have to go out of business if Deserey Crowther or her mother had more money! It was at that moment I knew I was in big trouble!
I spent some time perusing the shelves. I was sad to think maybe an era is coming to an end. I could see it in the dust, smell it in the musty pungent odor of pages untouched and unread. I could hear it in the silence, no busy bodied obnoxious humans to roam the isles, no sound of whispering, nothing audible to sense a book was being pulled from it's rightful place. My reading heart could feel it. Books being crowded out and forced into the dark corners of yesterday.
I decided I better find her. I knew she'd be racking up serious damages. She never disappoints me when it comes to buying a stack of books!
I came around the corner and there she was. "LOOK MOM!" Her face was lit up like Christmas and her arms were full, cradling a stack of books piled so high she could barely pack them all. I think that was about the moment the fun started. I too love to read. I love words and black ink on pages. I love humans expressing those things we can't talk about out loud. I love reading emotions and plots spelled out in letters on one page after another. And her excitement was infections. Oh, that beautiful smile she has, those dark eyes that reel you into her heart in a fleeting second, her enthusiasm, her authentic way of being. . . I was taken with it.
Des started showing me her collection. I took interest when she showed me an old book by Walt Whitman she'd picked up. She led me to the isle where poetry books by Lord Alfred Tennyson and Emily Dickinson were poised gracefully just waiting for my wallet to show up! She hooked me line and sinker on the poetry isle. She's brilliant.
The excitement and humor just continued to build as she showed me one book after another. I've long wanted to be a writer. I've wanted to write a book my whole life. I love writing! I love it as much as taking pictures. It does something to me. It feeds my soul. Choosing words to put on paper is like choosing entrees at the presidential buffet table of life! There are so many delicious choices! It's an art to pick just the right word and place it in just the right spot on a page! Des and I talked about all the plots and stories we'd imagined putting on paper. We each took turns pulling one masterpiece after another off the shelf. We huddled in our little corner of the world and laughed and giggled and gasped with every old worn bound treasure we pulled from the shelf.
I kept saying over and over again. "WE GOTTA GET OUT OF HERE!" She just took me deeper and deeper into the faded walls of paper.
I found a book by Alice B. Emerson, "Ruth Fielding and Her Double." "The Ruth Fielding Series is a 30 volume series that was published by Cupples and Leon from 1913 through 1934. Three authors wrote the series under the pseudonym of Alice B. Emerson. When I saw the price tag of 96.00 dollars, Des flipped out. When I saw her head spin back with that horse gaping silent spasm of a grin she gets when her laughter grips her so hard she can't breathe, I could not restrain myself any longer. Now I was doubled over in hysterics. I didn't buy the book! Oh I wanted to!!! I will never forget her face when the manager opened the cover and went to ring up 96 dollars! I nearly passed out!
We decided to go look for a cheaper book because if you bought four books the fifth one was free. How about when you buy twenty books. How many are free then?
We went back to the shelves. It was when I picked up the book, "How To Be Your Own Best Friend," giddiness set in for the entire night! There were more books to fuel our gut wrenching laughter, like when Des found, "Raising a Thinking Child!" We were engulfed now in spontaneous outbursts of loud unrestrained giggling as we made our way past one section after another.
There were old "Life" magazines and comic books. Rows and rows of shelves stacked high with every kind of reading you could imagine.
Then we found it. It was the find of the night. "How To Survive The Loss Of A Love." I started reading it to Deserey in my Jacob Grimm story telling voice. Tears were falling, my sides hurt so bad I could barely read. We started to draw attention when our hysterics got audibly out of control.
It was the last poem I read that drew the manager's glare.
"first
I have to get
out
of love with you.
second
I have to remember
don't fall
until you see
the whites
of their lies."
Trust me. You had to be there to truly appreciate it. We bought every 3 dollar copy the store had. I had to have one! And Des wanted one for herself and of course she knows lots of girls with broken hearts. Lol. Now, there's not a copy left in the store! We're saving the female world. Priceless!
We finished our night with dinner at the Blue Bird. First though we had to to take our heavy load to the car before we could go and sit down to eat. Who can eat at a restaurant with a massive stack of books piled high at your feet? As we left the book store, Des picked a little goody from the pile. It was a classic she'd found in the children's section. The title demanded we buy it. It was called "A Girl Can Dream" by Betty Cavanna. Des couldn't resist. How could she? A girl really can dream! My Des, she has dreams and I have dreams for her. The book's title won us. "Do you want me to read to you mom?" I nodded affirmatively. We have changed roles, she and I. "Read to me Des!" I insisted. She read to me as we crossed the road at the light. She read as we walked under the trees down the side of the tabernacle in the shade of the cool early evening. She read to me on the way back from the car, through the crowds of people that mingled here and there through racks of clothing lining main street. And as we found our way to a table at the back of the Blue Bird and waited for our Chicken Cordon Bleu, she read. It was so soul filling I hardly had room for dinner. It was the perfect ending to a perfect night, a night I shall never forget! Yup, these are the moments life was made for! Funnest night ever!
Hope Is The Thing With Feathers
"Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul,And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all. . ."
Sometimes losing balance for love is part of living balance in life. The physics of a quest, a force in nature governed by laws as real as the laws Gravity or Momentum. And the rule of Quest Physics maybe goes like this:
"If you are brave enough to leave behind everything familiar and comforting (which can be anything from your house to your bitter resentments) and set out on a truth-seeking journey (either externally or internally), and if you are truly willing to regard everything that happens to you on that journey as a clue, and if you accept everyone you meet along the way as a teacher, and if you are prepared..... most of all..... to face (and forgive) some very difficult realities about yourself...... then truth will not be withheld from you."
Photography 'IS' Emotion
"Don't shoot what it looks like. Shoot what it feels like!"
~David Allen Harvey
Every Sunset
"Know what you want to do, hold the thought firmly
And do everyday what should be done,
And every sunset will see you that much nearer to your goal."
~E. Hubbard
Mr. Personality!
Don't try to tell me that animals don't have awesome personalities! I have been around animals all my life. Some of them I think I even like better than a few people I know. hahahaha
I met him. . . Mr. Personality. He was a little shy. I pulled up along side of him with my big guns aimed carefully and he quickly stuck his head in the sage brush. He stayed there for a bit. I surmised he was thinking I would leave. He doesn't know me very well. He didn't want his picture taken. No one ever wants their picture taken. Gee whiz!
I waited patiently!
I waited patiently!
Then he looked at me and his face said it all, "Hey Lady, you're really bugging me. He even stuck his tongue out at me.
I loved the ornamental sage brush stuck to his fur. It just added to his obvious annoyance with me. I framed that face and then watched him saunter off. I swore I could hear him muttering under his breath as he made his way across the road.
He doesn't know I coming back to find him again tomorrow. I want to tell him we're in a relationship now. I'm in love!
"Oh, give me a home where the buffalo roam
Where the deer and the antelope play.
Where seldom is heard a discouraging word
And the skies are not cloudy all day."
Where seldom is heard a discouraging word
And the skies are not cloudy all day."
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